Daily Sizzle: Spend 30 dollars or try… PARENTING

The Daily Sizzle is where us here at FM, rant, rave, hate, and date pretty much anything we want.

http://gizmodo.com/5261192/the-gamedr-doesnt-have-a-phd-but-will-drive-your-kids-nuts

50 years ago, people didn’t have any trouble controlling their kids, they just beat them.  I saw the Jackson 5 made for tv movie.  I know the facts.  Today, everyone is concerned with being the perfect parent because, lets face it, in the the 21st century, if you don’t do it perfect the first time, you’re going to cheat and end up in prison.  I’m glad you brought up prison, because thats where the makers of the Game Dr. should go for creating yet another loophole out of parenting.  It’s ironic.  Remember when video games were considered a way to get out of real parenting?  Back when I got my Super Nintendo, I could just sit in front of the tv for hours and hours playing Star Fox FX to my hearts content and you know what?  I did, and I didn’t do cocaine or have sex afterwards. Then somewhere a long the line, everyone decided that video games were no longer a parental savior but had become this evil demon box that created serial killers, rapists, and Insane Clown Posse fans.  Here’s what actually happened and I defy ANYONE to disprove my theory:

In the 90’s and (20)00’s, video game popularity skyrocketed due to great advances in visual technology and a vastly expanding technological landscape (like that one? I know, its a keeper), Kids were spending more time in front of their computers and televisions and parents were probably pretty damn happy about it.  They could go about their gardening and running and drinking without being bothered by their kids when they didn’t want to be.  But then they’re kids got fat and the parents needed someone to blame.  So they went to their kids pediatrician;  “Is it the meals we’ve been cooking!?” they’d exclaim!

“No, I don’t see any problem in 1998 with High Fructose Corn Syrup being in everything that you feed to your child… its not like they’re drinking purple stuff… are you letting your kids drink purple stuff?”

“NEVER! I’ve seen the commercials, kids hate purple stuff. Well then what could it be!?”

“Well, as far as I can tell, you’ve been a perfect parent, its clearly that nin…nin…that demon box they sit in front of for hours upon hours a day.”  So then this whole crusade started; Parents vs Consoles.  It basically played out like Terminator.  There was a parent who traveled back in time to save the kid who would later become the parent who would destroy the consoles in the final battle for parenting supremecy.

THAT brings us to 2009, where apparently, having a box built over a power cable will prevent teennagers from buying another power cable and enjoying their video games anyway.  If this had come out 10 years ago, it could have been a force to be reckoned with. Children would have just sat next to the box with a rock hammer that they had traded 4 packs of ciggerettes for and slowly tried to destroy the box over 20 years. Without the internet, it was pretty much impossible to find anything.  Do you remember buying anything before the internet was around?  I didn’t think so.

by roninpowride
2 years ago